THE WIDE NET

SYNOPSIS:

William complains to his neighbor and drinking buddy,Virgil, that his pregnant wife
Hazel is ignoring him. To cheer himself up, he and Virgil go out on the town. When he
staggers home early the next morning, he finds a letter from Hazel, telling him that she
went off to drown herself in the river. William panics and summons Virgil and other
neighbors to help him dredge the river for Hazel. They are accompanied by Doc who
owns the widest fishing net in the county. The men spend the day on the river, catch
lots of fish and other interesting items, have a fish fry and tell stories, but they can’t find
Hazel. A surprise awaits William when he gets home.

CHARACTERS:

WILLIAM (WILLIAM WALLACE JAMIESON) -- a country boy, 22 years old

HAZEL -- his wife, 18 years old

VIRGIL -- his neighbor, 22 years old

DOC – in his 50’s. Enjoys sharing his wisdom with no one in particular.

MALONE – a burly farmer, about 30. He holds a stick with cut-out heads of his father
and several brothers, thus indicating that the entire family is present. All MALONES
resemble each other.

SAM BELL – a black boy of 11

ROBBIE BELL – SAM’s brother, age 10

OFFSTAGE SOUNDS:

MALONE chorus, dogs barking, birds singing, distant church
choir.

SAMPLE DIALOGUE (from The Wide Net):

DOC is sitting on his porch, smoking a pipe. WILLIAM, VIRGIL and MALONE stand at the edge of the stage.

DOC:
Climb up and come in! Harvest’s over… corn’s all in, hogs getting ripe… hay cut… molasses made. Big explosions’ over, supervisors elected, some pleased, some ain’t. We’re hearing talk of war!
WILLIAM, VIRGIL, MALONE approach DOC’s porch.

DOC: (CONT’D)
Many’s been saved at revival. Twenty-two last Sunday, including a Doyle, ought to counted two. Hope they’ll be a blessing to Dover community besides a shining star in Heaven. Now what?

WILLIAM:
If nobody’s using your wide net, could we use it?

DOC:
You just used it a month ago. It ain’t your turn.

VIRGIL: (Clears his throat).
We got reason to think William Wallace’s wife Hazel is in the river, drownded.

DOC:
What reason have you got to think she’s in the river drowned? (Takes a puff.) I’m asking the husband.

WILLIAM:
Because she’s not in the house.

DOC:
Vanished? (Knocks out the pipe.)

WILLIAM:
Plumb vanished.

DOC:
A thousand things could have happened to her (Finds another pipe, lights it.)

VIRGIL:
Hand him up the letter, William Wallace. We can’t wait till Doomsday for the net while Doc sits back thinking.

WILLIAM:
I ain’t got it. I tore it up. But I know it by heart. It said she was going to jump straight in the Pearl River and that I’d be sorry.

DOC:
Where do you come in, Virgil?

VIRGIL:
I was in the same place where William Wallace sat on his neck all night, and done as much as he done, and come home at the same time.

DOC:
Y’all were out cuttin’ up, so Lady Hazel has to jump in the river, is that it? Cause and effect? Anybody want to argue with me?

WILLIAM: (to MALONE and VIRGIL)
Doc is the smartest man around, but he sure takes his time.